Exam Question
The following is an actual exam question given on a University of Washington chemistry midterm. The answer by one
student was so "profound" that the professor shared it with colleagues, via the Internet, which is, of
course, why we have the pleasure of enjoying it as well.
Bonus Question: Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic (absorbs heat)?
Most of the students wrote proofs of their belief using Boyle's Law (gas cools off when it expands and heats up
when it is compressed) or some variant. One student, however, wrote the following:
"First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time. So we need to know the rate at which souls
are moving into Hell and the rate that they are leaving. I think that we can safely assume that once a soul gets
to Hell, it will not leave. Therefore: no souls are leaving. As for how many souls are entering Hell, lets look
at the different religions that exist in the world today. Some of these religions state that if you are not a member
of their religion, you will go to Hell. Since there is more than one of these religions and since people not belong
to more than one religion, we can project that most souls go to Hell. Also, with birth and death rates as they
are, we can expect the number of souls in Hell to increase exponentially. Now, we look at the rate of change of
the volume in Hell because Boyle's Law states: That in order for the temperature and pressure in Hell to stay the
same, then Hell must expand proportionately as souls are added. “This gives two possibilities: "If Hell is
expanding at a slower rate then the rate at which souls enter Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will
increase until all Hell breaks loose. If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the rate at which souls enter
Hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell freezes over." If we accept the postulate given
to me by "Teresa" during my Freshman year, "that it will be a cold day in Hell before I sleep with
you," and into account the fact that I still have not succeeded in having that event take place, then #2 cannot
be true, and thus I am sure that Hell is exothermic and will not freeze."
The student received the only 'A' given.